Childhood Aggression

• seeing other family members arguing or being angry with each other
• friendship problems
• being bullied – Anti-bulling alliance will provide more information on bullying.
• struggling with schoolwork or exams
• feeling very stressed, anxious, or fearful about something
• coping with hormone changes during puberty

Team up with your child to help them deal with their anger. This way, you let your child know that the anger is the problem, not them.

With younger children, this can be fun and creative. Give anger a name and try drawing it – for example, anger can be a volcano that eventually explodes.

How you respond to anger can influence how your child responds to anger. Making it something you tackle together can help you both.

Being able to spot the signs of anger early can help your child make more positive decisions about how to handle it.

Talk about what your child feels when they start to get angry. For example, they may notice that:

• their heart beats faster
• their muscles tense.
• they clench their teeth.
• they make a fist.
• their stomach churns.

Work together to try to find out what triggers the anger. Talk about helpful strategies for managing anger.

You could encourage your child to:

• count to 10
• walk away from the situation.
• breathe slowly and deeply.
• clench and unclench their fists to ease tension.
• talk to a trusted person.
• go to a private place to calm down.

If you see the early signs of anger in your child, say so. This gives them the chance to try their strategies.

Encourage regular active play and exercise.

Staying active can be a way to reduce or stop feelings of anger. It can also be a way to improve feelings of stress, anxiety, or depression.

For older children or young people, this could be simple activities, such as:

• a short walk
• jogging or running
• cycling

for more information, please see NHS/physical activity for children and young people.

If you're concerned your child's anger is harmful to them or people around them, you could talk to a:

• GP
• health visitor
• school nurse
• social prescribing link worker 
• or other health professional 

If necessary, one of the above may refer your child to a local Children & Young Person’s Mental Health Team for specialist help.

CYPMHS is used as a term for all services that work with children and young people who have difficulties with their emotional or behavioural wellbeing.

You may also be able to refer your child yourself without seeing a GP or one of the above professionals.